That fear could be the very window to your success.
A perfect example would be my fear of public speaking. The truth of the matter is I, like most human beings (statistically speaking), feared public speaking more than death. When I signed up to study business and photography as a freshman in college, my dad suggested that I also take a public speaking class. I said “not on your life!” I firmly believed that there was absolutely, positively nothing I would ever do in my entire life that would require me to stand in front of an audience and speak. My dad had a good laugh at that comment.
“Son,” he said, “there is nothing you will ever do in your entire life where you will NOT be required to stand in front of an audience and speak.”
After about an hour and a half of debate, I finally gave in. I told him I would take the class–as long as he didn’t murmur so much as a word when I undoubtedly failed it.
On the first day of class, my teacher assigned a book that we were to speak on–and I hated it. I didn’t agree with a single word I read on its pages. Fuming, I went home and slammed the book down in front of my dad.
“What’s your problem?” he asked.
“I am required to give a speech out of a book that I disagree with!” I told him angrily.
“Son,” he responded without batting an eye, “did she say you have to agree with the book?”
Silence.
To the best of my knowledge, she hadn’t specified that particular detail, I admitted. “Then say whatever you want,” he said, going back to his newspaper without another thought.
On the day of my speech, six people went before me–and they all had chosen the exact same topic I had! They all spoke on listening, and they all seemed to recite the same rhetoric the book had espoused. The book that I disagreed with. When I finally got up to the lectern I said to the class, “Well, I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news. Which do you want first?” This, by the way, was not how I planned to begin.
“The bad news!” someone yelled out.
“Well, the bad news is my topic is the same one you’ve been listening to for this entire class period.” And everyone groaned.
“What’s the good news?” someone asked
“The good news is I disagree with every person that went before me.”
At those words, everyone in the class sat up, went silent and listened. They were interested. They were engaged. And I was hooked.
And now look at what I do for a living.
Sometimes the things we’re scared of are the most real and insightful. They are the things that touch the deepest nerve, a nerve connected to something that really matters to us. It’s something you care about, and it can evolve to be the most important part of your life.
We so often think our fears are protecting us—which is sometimes true. After all the fear of death is generally a pretty good deterrent to jumping out of an airplane without a parachute. But I would argue that fear isn’t there to stop us from jumping, it’s there to teach us the obstacles and failures that stand in our way of success. Fear teaches us to put on a parachute–not give up on skydiving. Let fear protect you, not stop you! And realize the insight of fear isn’t always about the task at hand.
I found that my goal wasn’t to be a public speaker, it was to deliver a message; it was to have the courage to disagree, and to empower others to stand in their own strength and personal leadership. Speaking just happens to be an ideal forum for delivery and had I stopped at the fear, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to impact the thousands of lives I’ve been privileged to impact. Fear can signal to us what we’re supposed to pay attention to, and encourage to search for the best way to handle a situation. Once you’ve paid attention to the dangers and prepared for the risks, all that’s left is thrill of jump!
