Leaders often assume trust is built during the big moments — the major decisions, the visible wins, the high-stakes conversations.
Those moments matter. But they are not where trust is primarily formed.
Trust is built — or eroded — in the small, everyday responses leaders barely notice.
In my work with teams, I often see the same pattern. A leader believes the culture is healthy because nothing dramatic has gone wrong. Meanwhile, team members are quietly drawing conclusions based on dozens of small interactions: how feedback is received, whether ideas get explored or explained away, how mistakes are handled, and what happens when someone pushes back.
None of these moments make the quarterly report. But they shape the emotional math people use to decide whether it’s safe to fully engage.
Most trust erosion is not intentional.
But trust starts to crumble when people offer ideas and feel subtly corrected, overridden, or invalidated — or worse. They don’t usually argue. They simply recalibrate how much of themselves they bring forward next time.
And that quiet recalibration is where trust begins to thin.
From the leader’s vantage point, nothing dramatic occurred. From the employee’s vantage point, useful data was just collected.
Leaders who build durable trust tend to stay curious longer. They regulate their own defensiveness. They respond in ways that keep the conversational door open.
Notice what’s not required: perfection.
Trust does not require flawless leadership. It requires predictable emotional safety.
When people believe they can bring forward incomplete ideas, dissenting views, or early concerns without being subtly shut down, the entire system gets smarter.
This week, pay attention to the small moments. How do you respond to pushback? What happens when someone’s idea needs refinement? Where might people be quietly self-editing around you?
Because in most organizations, trust isn’t lost in a single dramatic failure.
It erodes, one small interaction at a time.
Photo by Alexandre Chambon on Unsplash
