The Apology That Strengthens Authority
Imagine hearing a leader say something like this: "I recognize that I was unclear about what I needed. I put you in an awkward situation, and it affected your ability to succeed. For that, I truly apologize." What's your reaction? For most people, the first instinct...
Holding Leaders Accountable (Not Just Their Teams)
We spend a lot of time in leadership development talking about how leaders can hold their teams accountable. How to set expectations clearly. How to give feedback that doesn't damage relationships. How to address underperformance without eroding trust. Those are...
The Leader Who Keeps Everyone Guessing
I want to tell you about a pattern I hear described more often than I'd like. Someone works for a leader who is capable, often impressive, and, by all external accounts, doing a good job. Their peers respect them. Their boss trusts them. The results are there. And yet...
When Coaching Doesn’t Stick (And Why That’s Not the Whole Story)
I get asked a version of this question fairly often: Have you ever had a client for whom coaching didn't stick? My answer is yes. But also no. And the reason for both is worth unpacking — because how we answer that question says a lot about how we understand change,...
Mary Pickford and the Ship That Couldn’t Be Sunk
Mary Pickford — one of the most influential figures in early Hollywood — said this: "All the water in the world cannot sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship. All the negativity in the world cannot sink a person unless it gets inside your mind." Read that twice....
Conflict Doesn’t Start When Things Get Hard — It Starts Long Before
When conflict shows up in an organization, most leaders respond to it as an event. Something went wrong. People are in disagreement. Now we need to manage it, resolve it, move through it. That's a reasonable response. It's also mostly too late. Because by the time...
Can You Be Right and Be Loving at the Same Time?
In Season 2, Episode 10 of Ted Lasso, Rebecca’s mom asks the age-old question, "...when all's said and done, what's more important, being loving or being right?" As leaders, we often face that dilemma, and right often wins when it’s a choice. But the real answer isn't...
Not Everything Is Your Fault — But It Might Be Your Responsibility
Most conflicts in organizations aren't actually about the problem. They're about who caused it. The moment something goes wrong, a familiar sequence begins. People start positioning. Protecting. Explaining why the thing that happened wasn't their fault, or at least...
The Lagrange Point
Here's something I didn’t previously know about satellites. A satellite orbiting Earth isn't hovering. It's constantly falling toward the planet — it just happens to be moving fast enough, and from a distance high enough, that as it falls, it swings around Earth...
How to Raise a Leadership Issue When You’re Not the One in Charge
One of the questions I get most often — not from executives, but from the people around them — goes something like this: I can see that something isn't working. I think my leader needs to hear it. But I don't know how to bring it up without making things worse or...
